Raising concerns about your child with their school can feel daunting, especially if you’re worried about being seen as difficult. But you know your child best, and schools want to help. A clear, well-prepared conversation is often the fastest route to the support your child needs.
Prepare before you go
A little preparation turns a worrying conversation into a productive one:
- write down your concerns with specific, dated examples
- note what you’ve already tried at home, and what’s helped
- bring any reports or assessments you already have
- decide the one or two outcomes you most want from the meeting
Ask for the class teacher first, and request the SENCO joins if support is already in place or likely to be needed.
It can help to send a short summary before the meeting: what your child finds hard, when it happens, what helps and what you would like to understand. This gives everyone a useful starting point and helps the meeting stay focused on your child rather than on labels.
What to ask
- What have you noticed in class, and how is my child doing day to day?
- What support is already available, and what has been tried?
- What happens next, and by when — can we agree a date to review it?
- Who is the named person I should contact?
Write the answers down during the meeting, and ask for the agreed actions in writing afterwards.
Keep the conversation collaborative
You and the school share the same goal. Phrases like “I’m wondering whether…” or “how can we work together on this?” keep the door open. If you feel unheard, stay calm, restate your concern, and ask for a follow-up with the SENCO. You have a right to be listened to.
Put things in writing
After any meeting, send a short email summarising what was agreed and who will do what. A written record keeps things moving and is invaluable if support doesn’t materialise. If concerns continue, request a meeting with the SENCO and ask about the school’s graduated approach to SEND.
A simple follow-up can be enough:
Thank you for meeting with me today. My understanding is that [support] will be put in place by [date], and that we will review it on [date]. Please let me know if I have missed anything.
Know your next steps
If school-based support isn’t enough, the next step may be an Education, Health and Care needs assessment. Our plain-English guide to EHCPs explains how that process works and how to prepare.
How Edjuvera can help
Our experienced SEND tutors work alongside schools and families, providing the one-to-one support a child needs and clear reporting back to everyone involved. Read more about how we work with schools and local authorities, or get in touch to talk it through.
